Another Page in My Story: Why must I choose?

Okay, so I’ve been working on-and-off on this entry for the last couple of days, and am finally forcing self to focus and write, so we’ll see where this takes us.
Yeah, well, it’s taken me another two days to gain access to this computer, but I will spare you all the details!
Am wrestling within my faith and beliefs this early Friday morning, Folks!

I’ve been given an ultimatum on FB to choose between love for family and those who need my prayers and support. So I sit here vacillating between my faith and beliefs and the sheer incredulity of how far a “Christian” will go when he/she is angry at a third-party and I must “choose” between the two relationships.  My heart is staggering under this mockery of one who touts Christ and then demands that I must believe as he/she does lest they cut me off from all contact….really?? Why must I choose? Why cannot I support the both of you without one or the other feeling threatened and vulnerable in a relationship that is between “me and thee”?

I am angry to find myself within the vast mire of your colored judgments and opinions! How dare you question my unwavering love for family! Where are your beliefs? Where is your forgiveness? Why can’t you just let go and move on?! It is none of your business who I call “Friend”, for in judging them, you judge me and question my integrity – and that angers me!

This, then, is why I hate, make that loathe, organized religion!  I consider myself a Follower of Christ, spreading His word as ordained by His Living Word, and will readily share when asked, that, no, I don’t attend any given church, and yes, I am a sinner forgiven by a loving and gracious God. I generally give people the benefit of the doubt until I’ve had time to know them. Granted, this third-party has not been so nice to me in days past, but I was able to forgive and forget and forge on, trusting God through the process as I continued to pray for him.  Now, two years later, I’m being advised to drop this third-party because of his shortcomings, i.e., his “sins”.  Seriously? Who are you to judge?

God, help me!

I’m in a quandary, and while I chose “Family” over “Third Party”  for now, if for nothing else but to maintain some semblance of peace within the family, I still struggle….how many more family members dare I alienate and risk losing (I’m already in the “Outer Camp” with several of them), by “choosing not to choose” ? What would Christ do?

What would you do?
GEEZ! Maybe I should go back to bed and get up on the other side….oh, wait! It’s against the wall! Which, sadly, is where I am right now….{sigh}

“How often do we wait for God to get our attention? We live our busy, stressful lives and only slow down to talk to God when something breaks. Then He has our full attention. But that’s backward. Look at your life. What do you really want to do? God is doing it somewhere. How do you really want to feel? God is healing someone’s heart. What do you want to know? God is teaching people across the globe. Flag Him down. It will be the brightest spot in His day.

From the Screening Room,
Melinda Ledman”


About timpson

Retired, I sew, quilt, paint, refinish furniture, love to DIY, and surf the net.
This entry was posted in Faith, Family, guilt and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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